Small girl

Recently,

I went for Dim Sum.

&

There was a family sitting in the next table.

That family happened to have lil kids.

There was this lil girl,

Maybe 2 or 3 years old.

She was walking around.

Then she saw me!

The moment she saw me,

She pull up her dress, to show me her stomach!

DO I HAVE THE WORD "HAMSAP" written over my head????

=)

Muscle.

This conversation took place one nice day!

GUY: U know which muscle in our body is the strongest?

HANJIEN: *Thinks deep down inside, surely our lil brother* YES! I know! Our lil brother is the strongest muscle lar! so easy!

GUY: No lar! the strongest muscle is out TONGUE!

HANJIEN: WTH! is tongue even a muscle? okayy okayy, maybe it is! BUT WHY???!!

*i asked him the following*

HANJIEN: Can tongue HARDEN & GROW Longer??!!! Can tongue shoot our STUFFSS??!!! Can tongue make babies??!!! Maybe it can satisfy something lar, but still, its not the strongest muscle!

GUY: OKIE LAR OKIE LAR! Lil Brother is the Strongest MUSCLE K!

=)

Too Much Texting!

Tuesday,
I went outstation with daddy to see something.
I was TEXTING through the whole journey ( u urself know who ya =P )
While I was driving and not driving also I texted.
I kinda knew my dad realised and he wanted to say something,
But he didnt.
Then,
When daddy was driving,
I was reading newspaper & TEXTING!
&
I came across this lil thing

















I quickly HID the news thingy from my dad,
If he sees, He surely will say something wan!

People out there,
Dont TEXT TOO MUCH, It's DANGEROUS!

=)

Handphone Store

On a nice Saturday afternoon,
I went to a Handphone Store to BORROW some handphones.
It was super packed,
Until I could just sneak out a PHONE without anyone noticing!
Unfortunately,
Almost successfully at the exit with a stolen phone, I got caught!
Damm!!



Okie okie,
I got carried away.

It was super packed,
Grandson buying phone for grandfather,
Teacher buying phone for students,
Ppl buying phone for maids,
Ppl buying phone for the sales ppl.
&
This,
Parents buying phone for their SON!

While the son was looking through the phone,
The MUM said this,
" If u want this phone, u gotta 'blablabla' first.

Then the SON,
*takes up his right hand* ( i thought he wanted to slap his mum)
" I PROMISE TO MASTERBATE everyday " ( just JK)

Real one,
" I PROMISE TO STUDY HARD "

Then the MUM,
" WHAT?? I cannot hear U "

SON,
" Cannot hear ar?? okie lor, dont buy lor!!, u think i need the phone? =P "

No lar,
The son repeated again the whole thing.
&
They parents finally bought him the phone.

So easy to get new things nowadays,
All u have to do is take up right hand, & LIE!

Next time,
I'll say " I PROMISE TO BE A GOOD BOY! "
&
My mummy will BUY ME A HOUSE! WOHOOO!

=)

Board Game!

Me Is Back!

Recently, I went to A BOARD GAME PLAYING place.

It's quite a cool place to hang out!
Since,
It's playing board games.
(Not only Monopoly K!)

The staff there kinda introduced to us a game called BANG!
(the moment he said that BANG! word, I wanted to laugh edi, try to think dirty k)






















Then,
We played.
&
He kinda explained here and there about the game.

The main purpose is BANG!-ING! ur targets which is also means Shooting him or her.


He started the 1st move.
&
There were girls playing also.
The guy was like,

"OK~! Now I wanna BANG! U! *points to one of the girl*.


I really wanted to LAUGH!
It's like, so easily can BANG! a girl! hahahaha! (Police wont catch u meh?)


There was an option to avoid the shooting of ur opponents,
It's like,
When ur oppenent BANG! U, U can simply use a thing called MISSED!
Means, the BANG!-ING! process MISSES!


How nice if we can practice this steps in real life!

A guy can simply go up to a girl n say, I WANNA BANG! U!
&
If the girl has the power, SHE CAN SAY MISSED! ( means the guy cannot BANG the girl, *if only rapists understand such terms*)

=)

On Break!

Cheat Money!

During one midnight,
I parked my car,
I saw one Parking Ticket Machine.
I thought they dont operate at nights.
If not, the Hantu's will come SAMAN!
So,
I inserted coins!
&
They actually work at night!
WTH!





















See!
Tipu MONEY!

=)

Guys and Toilet.

For guys,

U might face this all the time.

For girls,

Have this as a lil extra piece of info!

When we guys enter a toilet to PEE!

When there's another guy using 1, we wont go and use 2.

We will either use 3 or wait for the person in front to finish.

Simply because there is NO WALL IN BETWEEN 1 & 2.

The thing is,

We guys have something hanging out of us.

&

We dont like others to TER-LOOK at our PISTOL!

It's like,

They will KNOW how POWERFUL our gun is

&

They will SHOOT us!

On the other hand.

Girls,

When they go toilet,

They will have one room to themselves.

We guys, should be having rooms

&

Girls use the URINERS that guys are using now.

Simply coz,

Girls got ntg hanging out of them.

&

The girl beside peeing SIMPLY CANNOT see urs

&

U cannot see hers!

Coz,

BOTH ALSO HIDDEN!

LETS SWAP TOILETS GIRLS!

=)